Before reading this, if you haven’t already, make sure to check out my post written after Trump won the election here.

The key to a good joke is to make sure it doesn’t go on for too long, you need to know when to bring it to an end. There’s the punch line – boom, OK wrap it up now guys, that’s enough. You can stop now… Guys?

Yet despite all of this January 20th happened and Donald Trump is now the actual real – this isn’t a joke anymore – President of the United States of America.

To say Trump has been a sore winner would be an understatement. Now in England we had a little democratic vote, some of you may have heard of it, last year in where we voted to leave the European Union. A Brexit if you will (Good name, wonder if that will catch on), now I like many others were shocked that the result swung in favour of Leave, but looking at the overall results, that was the option that got the most votes. Now let’s go over to America and the results of their election. Donald Trump won the Presidency over Hilary Clinton, which also took everyone by surprise, and he did it by having fewer votes than her, due to America’s electorial system (Or Russia’s hacking, who knows?). In fact, Hilary won the popular vote by 2,864,903 votes (which is probably the amount of tickets left unsold at Trump’s inauguration). So the lesson here Kids is that, it doesn’t matter if you’re not the most popular kid in school, it doesn’t matter if you’re not the most liked, it doesn’t matter if you have different views and beliefs to your peers, it doesn’t matter if you want to sexually belittle or abuse women, it doesn’t matter if you hate people based on their race or religion, or want to mock people for their disabilities. You, you could one day become President.

Na, na, na-na, naaaaah

That last point, came up again a few weeks ago. At the Golden Globes, Meryl Streep gave a powerful acceptance speech, where she called out Donald Trump, without even saying his name, about his abuse of power and his

Trump was then quick to do what he does best. Go on Twitter and cry and whinge like a petulant school child. If anyone dared to speak against Trump, or make fun of Trump, or rightly call him out on anything he said, he would throw all his toys out the pram and actually pitch a tantrum akin to the ones you see in a supermarket, when a parent refuses their child sweets. Meryl Streep was no exception, with Trump brandishing this three-time Academy Award winning actress as overrated because, “the lady on TV said bad things about me, waaaa-waaaa!”

Others were quick to come to Trump’s defence as well, claiming he never mocked a disabled reporter – didn’t happen – despite the fact there is clear video proof of it happening. What’s it going to take for Trump to admit it? Have it printed on the side of a bus? Now the main defence that people has is that Trumps mocking gestures are ones he uses on multiple people, and have been brandished as proof.

The one at the end was the controversial clip of Trump mocking the reporter for his disability. Interesting how his mocking of the reporter went on for a lot longer than when he was mocking all the other people. Interesting two the way Trump’s right hand moves during this performance.

Image result for reporter trump mocked disability
This is your Leader America.

The other thing about his mannerisms used to mock people… well to me they seem quite derogatory. It’s almost the equivalent of sticking your tongue under your bottom lip and going “uuggghh,” which is what you do to indicate someone is being dumb, stupid, or retarded. Now I hate, utterly despite the word retard. It is a disgusting word that has evolved into a derogatory term people use to bully those with a disability, or to insult others by implying they to have something wrong with them. Let’s look at the video above again, imagine if you will that everyone time Trump does one of his stupid mannerisms, that he is in fact calling the person he is mocking a retard. The argument that Trump performing those mannerisms when mocking the reporter, is fine because he does that for everyone, somehow doesn’t seem to hold up anymore. If you call a disabled person a retard, just because you call everyone else a retard it doesn’t then make it OK.

Anyway that’s my interpretation on this situation, but maybe I’m looking into it too much. Maybe I’m biased because of my views against Trump. After all, despite the overwhelming evidence, Trump has still outright denied it, so maybe I’m wrong. But then again, this is also a man who after a video of him bragging about grabbing women by the pussy came out, claims he has no greater respect for them. I mean, who do I believe?

With everything that happened between the election results and January 20th, I don’t think we really believed that Trump would actually become President (Golden Showers anyone?), and that the Inauguration would reveal that this was all an act and we’d  all been fooled. At the very least, not many of us believed he would last in his new job post (How many bankruptcies did he face in his last few jobs?), in fact Alec Baldwin once again giving a spot on Trump performance on SNL said it best with this burn against Trump

“On January 20th, I, Donald J. Drumpf, will become the 45th president of the United States, and then, two months later, Mike Pence will become the 46th.”

Oh ho-ho, we all had a good laugh at that one, I’m sure Trump with his  good-natured sense of humour took it all in his stride too.

 “Waaa, Mommy the Ghost from Beetlejuice said mean things about me”

I had no intention of watching the inauguration, however I came back from work and opened up Facebook to find about ive different live feeds on my timeline of the event, and like when you see a car accident on the motorway, I couldn’t turn away. I turned in just in time (Lucky me) to see the actual swearing-in itself, waiting for the moment where Donald Trump pauses, drops his head and says “I can’t do this,” or for Ashton Kutcher to jump on stage and shout down the camera: “You’ve just been Punk’d” or for the words “written by Armando Iannucci to appear on screen.  However no such thing happened, he was sworn in and that was that.

The whole thing was a pretty odd affair, the crowd was notably bare, definitely in comparison to the one that turned out for Obama. Grey clouds hung over the city, there were a lot of sombre and depressed faces. The girl they brought on to single the National Anthem sounded like she was forced to do so at gun point, even the new first lady looked pretty stone faced, but then I think that’s the expression she’s had permanently chiseled on her face she this whole thing started. It’s also been noted by many that it actually started raining when Trump was sworn in, with The Reverend Franklin Graham stating that “in the Bible, rain is a sign of God’s blessing.” It also rained on Inauguration days in 2001 and 1969 when George Bush and Richard Nixon were sworn in. Now I don’t know much about American Politics, but how did those blessed men work out for you guys?

As for the speech itself, it featured most of the tropes you’ve come to know and love except from the Don. A single tone voice with no sense of humility or any shred of humbleness? Check. Bizarre circular movements with his tiny, tiny hands? Check. That insufferable cocaine nose sniff between every *sniff* single *sniff* sentence? Ch-sniff*-eck! However there were elements of the speech’s content that didn’t seem to sit too well. He thanked Russia the world for electing him. This self obsessed Billionaire, who considered a Million Dollars a small loan, blasted the establishment for taking power from the people and protecting themselves. He even plagerised a Batman villain to emphasise giving power back to the citizens of America.

Worth noting here that Bane is telling a load of dangerous criminals to go out and f**k shit up.

Trump also mentioned how he is going to help struggling families, which seems somewhat backwards when he is trying to repeal healthcare from his gold plated elevator. Speaking of backwards talking, he mentioned how America will seek friendship with other nations, but at the same time screw everyone, America Rules! U-S-A, U-S-A. At one point he lead the crowd in a haunting chant of “America First, America First!” I don’t know about you, but that didn’t seem to bode well.

The best bit for me was when Trump signed his own resignation on stage, declaring that he “will no longer accept politicians that are all talk and no action.” Especially given his speech featured a lot of talk about eradicating ISIS, which he claims was founded by Obama, yet shook his hand after the speech. So is he in league with ISIS, who do I believe?
He also said he was going to create more jobs, which to give him credit there is a big old wall that needs building, so that will create a hell of a lot of jobs. Although no one is actually paying for this wall, so all these people will probably have to work for free. Well, at least it will keep them off the streets I suppose.

A lot of people have come out in support of Trump saying how he’s only just been made President “give him a chance.” “Just give him a chance.” Come on people, give this megalomaniac, xenophobic, sexist, abusive, egotistical, madman a chance. Come on people, aside from all the shit he’s said and done in this campaign, how do you expect him to do well if you don’t give him a chance?

Well we’re on Day One, so how are things looking so far? Well we’ve got to deal with the terrifying notion that being President means Trump now has two Twitter accounts (Jesus Christ). There’s also been a lot of uproar about several key issues being wiped from The White House website, including women’s rights, LGBT rights and Climate Change (Remember Climate Change, that thing China created right?). A lot of people are saying Trump personally deleted those accounts. Now to be fair, I think you give Trump too much credit that he could be able to manage anything larger than 140 characters, but in their defence a lot of these things were archived when the website was redesigned to make way for Trump. All of these articles and sections created under Obama’s administration are still available, just under a new domain. OK, that’s fair enough… so where are the new pages? And before you say “oh they haven’t finished the website yet,” the site looks pretty finished to me, and yet none of these key issues that were there before are anywhere to be found. Seriously, all of these things, which are important to a large percentage of American, completely wiped off the face of the website! Remember Civil Rights? Well if you don’t good luck finding anything about it on The White House website, because that’s gone too.

But seriously guys, just give it a chance.

angry annoyed frustrated rage stressed

Sorry everyone, but as far as I am concerned, Trump has had several chances, which he blew when he exhibited prejudice, promised to ban Muslims from America, shamed women based on looks, bragged about sexual assault and- Yeah you get the drill here.

Now despite my dislike for Trump, I will take issue with the people on social media yesterday, wishing for Trump to get assassinated during the ceremony. Seriously, what’s wrong with you, wishing death on someone else? Hoping that someone will take a shot at another human being? I may take issue with the man, but I’m not going to suggest that Americans who support the second amendment and their right to bear arms to take action against another person. Who do you think I am, Donald Trump?

To be fair, Donald Trump has created a job for Alec Baldwin for the next four years. Can’t wait to see what he has in store for us on tonight’s show.