The stage is set, the audience are sat waiting. None of them really want to be there, they’ve all be shepherded into the auditorium like a group of unruly school children forced to watch Shakespeare against their will. You stand in the wings, hearing the murmurs from the crowd, you focus on every fidget, every uninterested tut, every tap on a mobile device that indicates complete uninterest and lack of anticipation – but you’re still going to go out there and give it your all.

You walk out into the darkness, the spotlight switches on you. You catch a glimpse of the audience ahead of you for that split second your eyes take to adjust. You are met with faces of sheer contempt, boredom and total uninterest for the performance you are about to witness. But who cares about them, this is your moment. Time to give it all you’ve got. However no matter how good your performance may be, no one in the audience believes a single word – or at least they don’t believe the person on stage will uphold a single word that is coming out of the boring hole in their face. Oh they all clap at the end, but the applause gets less and less with each annual performance of the monologue of lies that is “My New Years Resolutions – A One Man show.”

This is basically just an over the top and dramatic way of me telling you that I have made some New Years Resolutions this year. Yes, I too have performed this monologue of lies, that we dust off and rehearse at the end of every year, ready to perform to a disinterested crowd at the beginning of the next. However following on from last weeks post, if we want to make 2017 a better year than its predecessor (which surely can’t be that difficult), then we need to step up and make it so. Therefore I am documenting said resolutions in blog format, which will be there to look back on at the end of this year to determine whether I was a success or a total failure. Either way, it will make for a fun distraction whilst living in a postapocalyptic world. So let’s get started with my first resolution:

Resolution 1: To See More Films.

I am a massive lover of cinema. I love everything about going to the cinema, the bright, big screen, the booming sound, the immersion into a new world, the escapism from reality. I love everything about cinema, although last year there was one exception: The Films.

Now that’s not to say I didn’t see some good films last year, don’t get me wrong. But my God there was a lot of crap pumped out last year. Granted there were some films released that, although we had some shred of hope they would surprise, we knew would be a steaming pile of shit.

Image result for jared leto joker
I mean the warning signs were right there.

But then there were also the films that tricked us into thinking they would be great, the ones that got us hyped, lifted our expectations, only to send them crashing to the ground when you realised they were following suite with the rest of 2016, in being a crushing weight of disappointment too.

Image result for jason bourne gif shaky cam
Couldn’t have said it better myself.

I was going to make a Top 5 list of Best and Worst films of the year, but it proved pretty difficult to do so. Difficult for the Top 5 as I struggled to find five films that were worthy of being on that list, and difficult because it was hard to find just five to be on the bottom list. Looking back on last year, there were also so many films that came out that I was unable to see, or didn’t get the chance to see. Films like Swiss Army Man and Hunt for the Wilderpeople were praised by critics and marketed really well, yet had such limited releases that you could only see them in small art house cinemas, on the 4th Tuesday of the month, but only if that Tuesday fell on a full moon, and if Jupiter was aligned directly with the 2nd moon of Mars. Yet there was also films like The B.F.G, Finding Dory and Hail Ceaser that got wide releases yet I still failed to see on the big screen.

So this year, my first resolution is to see more films in the cinema, but more specifically – Good Films. Cinema isn’t just watching films on a big screen, it is an experience, it should be a truly wonderful and unforgettable experience. It can is also be an expensive one and after last year I am fed up of throwing money at films that actually didn’t deserve a single penny. I saw more bad than good last year and missed out on more good than bad, so this year I am going to change that.

It helps that we start the year in Awards Season and with a lot of this years nominated fare having only just, or just about to be released in this country, the season essentially tells me what I should be watching over these next few months. Top of the list seemed to be the musical smash La La Land, which I saw a few days back and has gotten my 2017 movie going life off to a good start, let’s hope I can keep it on track.

If you haven’t seen this film yet – I urge you too, it’s one of those films that makes you glad to be in a cinema.


Next weeks Resolution – To Read More Books

P.S: Also for the record, in the end my Top 5 Fave films of last year were as follows: 

  1. Arrival
  2. Kubo and the Two Strings
  3. Hunt for the Wilderpeople (Which I was able to catch on Netflix recently)
  4. The Nice Guys
  5. Moana

And for the Top 5 worst films of the year I eventually narrowed down to

  1. Gods of Egypt
  2. Suicide Squad
  3. Special Correspondents
  4. Alice: Through The Looking Glass
  5. Batman v Superman: Dawn of (who are we kidding this is just a two hour trailer for) Justice (League)